Mother Wounds

Updated: Jun 10

What is a Mother Wound?

A mother wound can be defined as a mother not being emotionally attuned and available to you as a child. She may have been present physically but emotionally absent.

Let's look at Attunement

Staying present staying aware, It is to make receptive or aware to be accustom or acclimatized.

Attunement is the way we tune in to a child's needs, work to understand their thoughts, and respond to how they are feeling and behaving, while Attachment is the emotional bond between parents and children. Both attachment and attunement are important to the way a child views the world feels safe and forms relationships.

Mother wounds impact the subject of nurturing. Nurturing is very crucial to our growth and proper development as children. This is how we process love in the area of recovery or comforting ones self.

Here is an eg. Amy was asked to do something on her job for her boss but made a huge mistake, If Amy did not receive the proper nurturing or comfort that she needed as a child when mistakes were made, Amy would now go into a panic and beat up her self or even become fearful. Amy's mother most likely would have never taken the time to comfort her as a child, by letting her know that everything will be ok and mistakes happen but can be worked on. So there is no reference for Amy to draw from that would help her cope in this situation.

Note: Nurturing is the love that tells us everything is going to be ok.

I looked at the life of Gorge Floyd and I'm not sure if those of you who watched the horrifying act noticed the moment when he began to call on his mother. This was a prime example that even as an adult experiencing the worst and most traumatic experience the one person he was calling on was his mother.

We struggle in life as adults because many of us don't have a reference of comfort, most people end up numbing out, checking out, or falling into addiction.

What Nurturing tells us

  1. It's gonna be ok

  2. You're comforted

  3. You're gonna get through this

  4. You don't have to go to addictions

  5. You don't have to become a workaholic.

  6. You don't have to become numb or check out.

Ways to know if you have Mother wounds

  1. Did your mother show you comfort?

  2. Were you able to share a bad moment without being judged?

  3. Did she show you affection?

  4. Was your environment cold?

  5. Were you hugged often?

  6. Were you shown affection by kind physical touch?

  7. Are comfortable with receiving help.

  8. Are you familiar with comforting words?

  9. Is receiving the Holy Spirit challenging for you.

  10. Did your mom equip you to know how to handle certain emotional things in your life?

  11. Do you struggle with mood stability?

  12. Do you struggle with anxiety?

  13. Do you struggle with addictions?

It's important for us to recognize the wounds we carry that can get in the way of the freedom of authentic relationships we can have with God and others

How to be free

Accept God as Father

When we accept God as our Father we are finally able to heal from the wounds brought on by our birth parents.

  • Ask the Father to reveal himself to you.

  • Let the affection and affirmation you need come from the Father.

  • Spend time in worship and allow the Father to love on you.

Note: It's important for us to allow ourselves to be healed as women even before we become mothers, for those of you desiring motherhood, it's important to prepare yourself mentally and emotionally before you become pregnant. Allow the Holy Spirit to heal you and if you are already a mommy it's not too late for God to heal you and restore your relationship with your children.